Offensive Shirts

I am this many!  Make a statement and get a laugh with this awesome "I'm This Many" Toddler Shirt.  Perfect for that cool little one year old in your life.  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic 1st Birthday gift! Machine washable. Made...

Whoa, this kid is a handful! Why? Because he/she is 3! 3 AF!! That's why!  Between the ages of 2 and 5, parenting is a special kind of hard!! Customize your shirt to match the crazy stage in your life! Specifications:  Makes a...

My mommy doesn't want your advice, but thanks anyways.  You know what they say about advice, opinions and assholes; everyone's got them, but most should be kept to themselves!  Get this design on a BABY BODYSUIT too and make it a...

I'm Cute, Mom's Hot and Dad's Drunk! It's okay, we still love him. Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made with 100% Cotton, Love & Humor. White shirts are 100% cotton,...

Y'all Mother Fucker's need Jesus! You really do, He's great y'all! Show your sense of humor with this awesomely southern and funny Toddler Shirt.  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids!...

MERICA, FUCK YEAH!  Show some patriotism for the best damn nation in the world, and get some laughs with this ridiculously hilarious Toddler Shirt.  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool...

I mean, he is, isn't he?!  Get this design on a BABY BODYSUIT too and make it a matching set! Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine washable. Made with 100% Cotton, Love & Humor. Soft &...

This kid is destined to be a Smartass, Just like Mom & Dad!  This Future Smartass Toddler Shirt is perfect for kids with parents that are always making jokes! Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine...

Welcome to the SHIT SHOW kids!  On so many levels! It's about to get deep in here...  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made with 100% Love & Humor. White...

There is nothing wrong with being a music snob! We all know what good music is all about! But those other people? Well, their favorite band sucks, and that's just how it is. A perfect shirt for a Toddler's first concert, music festival or just to...

The blocks say it all.   Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine washable. Made with 100% Cotton, Love & Humor. Soft & Durable. Quality, tattoo like print that will hold up to the drool and...

It's Nap time, time for mom & dad to relax and chill.  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made with 100% Love & Humor. White shirts are 100% cotton, Heather Grey...

If you do know what it means, then you don't need to. If you do, then your kid needs this.     Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made with 100% Cotton, Love...

We've got a Little Badass on our hands!  This rock and roll Toddler Shirt is perfect for that cool little Toddler in your life!  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine...

SUCK IT!  Perfect Toddler Shirt for kids with bad attitudes!  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made with 100% Love & Humor. White shirts are 100% cotton,...

Why are they always so sweet for the grandparents and such a little shit at home?!  This badass toddler shirt says it like it is! Personalize it with Grandparents nickname of choice (Mimi, PawPaw, etc.) Just note wording change in special...

Back up buddy! Mind your own business and for god's sake, keep your hands to yourself!  People always want to be all up in a kid's personal space. Help your little one tell the world to back off, You Nosey Fucker with this awesome toddler...

Have you seen the feet on this kid?!  Get a laugh every time with this smartass Toddler Shirt. Mine's Bigger Than Yours!  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made...

Oh that kid? Yeah, he's okay. Give your toddler the award for World's Okayest child and celebrate mediocracy with the rest of us.  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made...

Enough said. Hilarious candy heart Toddler Shirt tells it like it is. Perfect for Valentine's Day, or just any day when you are feeling Cute as Fuck! Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine washable. Made with 100%...

I have come from Heaven, to cause Chaos and Destruction, Love me!!  Parenting is hard and kids are crazy. Sometimes it seems as if they are on a mission to cause trouble, and maybe, just maybe, that's true.  Specifications:  Makes a...

I don't know about you, but I'm cool. I've had MY vaccinations!  Get a laugh on the playground (and maybe make some friends) with this hilarious "It's OK we can play, I've got my shots!" Toddler Shirt. Perfect for cool parents with a sense...

I DO EPIC SHIT! Think about it, I started from a fucking cell! And here I am; learning to communicate today, and I'll be climbing mountains tomorrow!  The perfect shirt for epic toddlers that are ready for extreme awesomeness! ...

Hey Mom and Dad! Get off your #Instatwitface and play with me!!    Perfect gift for parents with a strong social media game!  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable...

AMERICA, FUCK YEAH!  Show some patriotism for the best damn nation in the world, and get some laughs with this hilariously ridiculous Toddler Shirt.  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine washable...

Everyones got that one Aunt.. She's one badass bitch and we love her for it! She'll tell you how it is and will always have your back!  Baby girl is lucky to have her! Show some love with this funny, unique and personalized Bitchy like my Aunt...

One of the greatest quotes in science history! Before electric cars and 80's rock bands, the name Tesla used to really mean something! Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made...

This Toddler is one Bad Mother Sucker!  Show off your Toddler's tough side with this Badass Pulp Fiction inspired Toddler Shirt.  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine washable. Made with 100% Cotton,...

Big racks make me hungry!  A great punny Toddler Shirt perfect for daddy's future hunting buddy!  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine washable. Made with 100% Cotton, Love & Humor. Soft &...

Don't mess with TEXAS or Rougned Odor will punch you in the FACE! It's a HIT! Celebrate one of the greatest punches in Basball History and the second greatest in Arlington (never forget Nolan pounding Ventura on the mound). Don't mess with Texas,...

Because everything is Bigger and more Badass in Texas! Show your pride with this "I'm from Texas" Toddler Shirt, and if they don't like it? Well, they can just kiss your ass (or wipe your kid's!)   Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday...

I'm not always Rainbows & Butterflies!  Just because I'm cute doesn't mean I have to be happy about it!  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made with 100%...

This Toddler has taken crazy to whole new level, Bat Shit Crazy!  Look out world, we've got a wild one on our hands!     Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine washable. Made with 100% Cotton, Love...

I don't care what you say, Clowns are creepy as hell! This, "I fucking hate clowns" Toddler Shirt is hilarious and perfect for that special person in your life with a clown phobia.    Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or...

Daddy loves cars, I love boobies... together we are a team of "Headlight Alignment Specialists".  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine washable. Made with 100% Cotton, Love & Humor. Soft & Durable...

We don't get mad, we get even!!   Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Birthday gift, or everyday wear for all the cool kids! Machine washable. Made with 100% Love & Humor. White shirts are 100% cotton, Heather Grey shirts are...

Watch out Mom & Dad! We've got a Future Hottie on our hands!  Specifications:  Makes a fantastic Baby Shower or Birthday gift! Machine washable. Made with 100% Cotton, Love & Humor. Soft & Durable. Quality, tattoo like print that...

Mind your Beeswax buddy!  People can be so nosey with little kids! "Are you still breastfeeding?" "Is he potty trained yet?" "Are they eating sugar for breakfast?" SHUT UP KAREN, It's none of your business.  Let your cool kid help you say what...